Wala pang isang oras nawalan na ako ng pagasa. Kanina pa dapat ako nasa Batcave and nagpapparty. My friends gave me a surprise party and M still here in front of my pc crying. HIndi ko na kaya preasure sakin. Kung suicidal lang ako two weeks ago pa ako patay. People will cry at hindi ako. Ako na umiiyak ngayon dahil hindi magawa ang inuutos gawin ng ibang tao at ng puso ko. Hindi ko na kaya. Naka makeup ako at basa na buong mukha and katwan ko. I wish god didn't made me this talented na pinaghihirapan ko idevelop since birth na ako lang ang nakadiscover without other people's help especially my family. I don't want to be compared to anybody kapag hindi ko magawa mga dapat kong gawin. Ayoko na talaga. Ayoko na. I fucking give up!
Sorry to my Bagets family. Sorry kinailangan nyo pa akong hntayin bago kumain tapos hindi rin naman ako makakpunta sa oras. sorry..
Sorry to my parents dahil hindi ko kayang gawin mga inuutos nila.
Sorry to my supervisor if they can't see my hardships. Sorry if I can't tell them all the things I have inside kasi I feel like they don't need to know naman.
Sorry to my friends kasi hindi ako nakakpagshare and happy side lagi pinapakita ko. Ayokong nakikita nila akong nahihirapan then they'll help me. I don't want to be a burden.
Sorry, to EES and EJ kasi pangit na performance ko.
Sorry God if I cant take care of this body. I'm sorry to my heart. I really am.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
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