I tried to kill myself

I went home yestenight with a severe headache. I wanted to sleep already but my hunger keeps me awake and I was waiting for a reply that didn't came. I stood up, grab some bucks and head to a store where no one is there so I head back home. I notice that there are two fags living infront of my house then I thought that i need some friends where I live. So I head back again to the store, I bought a cheezzy footlong, a bottle of soda and 2 sticks of cigar. When I get back home, they already leave their spot but I still ate my food in front of my house. The coldness of that night was very calming. It's like Fergie made the song "big Girls Don't Cry" just for me. Lol. But the moment was serene. Before I finish my 2nd cigar, my head hurts even more so I go straight to bed. Lying on my Bed, I cried. I was sobbing. I was upset not because my head hurts really badly, half because I don't know the progress of my relationship with Ken and the other half is because I'm killing myself. I tried to sleep with the sounds of the Mohicans but it didn't work. I was in agony for almost an hour then finally, thank god, I fell asleep.